As English becomes more
and more widespread, Madagascar has joined the parade. Back in the
day, Madagascar's president declared three official languages for the
island: Malagasy, French, and English. He was determined to turn his
people trilingual, and in this quest he demanded buckets of English
teachers from the Peace Corps. Working in the highlands it seems as
if the journey has been pretty successful. But then of course,
everything is more advanced in the highlands. The roads, the
teachers, the health structures—it's all better on the highlands.
So yes there are teachers here that speak English fluently, and I can
imagine surviving here as a tourist speaking only English. But of
course it is still concerning for my old village and the surrounding
area. They don't even have an English teacher, much less one that is
fluent. And so in a way, English has become yet another measurement
of disparity between the highlands and the coasts.
But I digress...
I have brought up this
subject merely as a consumer. You see, some of the products we buy
are covered in the English language. One possible reason is that the
island now has import/export relationships with English-speaking
nations. But the more probable reason in my opinion (and I think
you'll agree) is that producers are translating their products into
English in an attempt to gain more business. Madagascar and others
are opening up to the English-speaking world. And I love it.
To be clear, finding a
product in English does not cure any feelings of homesickness. But
it does
provide us with a little comedy.
So
I thought I'd share some examples. The first (also the first that
was humorous enough for us to take note) is not a product, but a
hotel. It's called Motel Violette, is located in Ambositra, and the
rumor among Americans is that it has the best pizza. We accidentally
stayed there when our trip home to Fianar was unexpectedly delayed.
And then we accidentally sampled their famous pizza without realizing
yet that it was famous—we were simply looking for some kind of
vegetarian option for Paul. My opinion: not the best pizza in
Madagascar. But it is
one of the few places with pizza that has a thicker crust,
American-style. I guess if that's what you miss, you'll love this
stuff. But I make homemade pizza all the time, and my crust ends up
the same, so I just don't think it's a big deal. Though perhaps I'm
biased.
Okay.
So without further ado, the Motel Violette advertisement brochure,
word for word (and in some cases, letter for letter—when in doubt,
trust that it is not a typo):
Motel Violette:
Bungalows / Chambres / Restaurant / Pizzeria
Here, furnitures and
boards are in good agreement with an atmospheres sweet and lights
where shadows and lights paly a wonderful symphony
For those whom
discovery of sites and walking under the open air have exhausted,
they can now discover cultural wealth of the region:
--Local working classes
(cabinet work, unlaid work, rabans with colours subjects of
basket-works)
--Hairdressign and the
“lamba arindrano” (the tress has a particular meaning in betsileo
tradition)
--The savika (violent
sport and dangerous but very popular in the region of Ambositra)
--The Zafindraony
canticles
--The Betsileo rija
--The volam-be tohaka.
When you have passed
the day for strollin, to rumbling many shops to inquire little
souvenirs and after making a halt at the terrace, you will find again
with pleasure the calm and the quietness of your hotel, the soft
confort and the freshness of your room or in pleasantly, arranged
bungalows, bathroom with hot water, the color television and the
constant attentions of a dynamic and young servants ready to comply
with your least wishes.
To the table of its
restaurant, Motel violette will show you the delight of its delicate
cooking. The french, malagasy and chinese gastronomy keep close
harmoniously on proposed cards. You can take “La saucisse Violeta”
the tradesman of our chef. The familial environment and the quality
of its cooking have largely contributed to the fame of Motel
Violette.
Excellent.
I am sure you all now want to visit Madagascar, if for no other
reason than to rumble shops in Ambositra.
Our
next favorite is a body gel that came with a loofah. I think it was
made in China. The brand is ROUSHUN and I'll just dive in.
Front:
Naturals
BODY WASH
Skin Care
EXPERT
SPA FRAGRANCE Ocean
Energy
--Cool Moisture--
Gentle for all skin
types
Back:
ROUSHUN Naturals BODY
WASH
OCEAN ENERGY
*Contains various of
vitamins and minerals from ocean. Smoothens and whitens your skin
and also improves the dry and rough skin. Prevent the dim skin and
makes the skin gentle and tender. It brings youa luxurious feeling
of bathing and gives birth to your silken skin. Just enjoy the brand
new feelings it brings to you.
DIRECTION
Wet your body and smear
some on the whole body, and then make it with rich foams with your
hand or bathing cotton. Rinse after a while.
The
most chill instructions ever. I assume the bathing cotton is the loofah.
Along
similar lines, we'll go ahead and finish your English lesson with
shampoo.
Front:
*PLANTS FRUIT ACID*
Eggs
Moisturizing Shampoo
Nutrition
Nourish & Repair
DOUBLE PROTECTION
SUPER PLIANCY &
WIPE OFF
Plant extracts
NEW
Back:
Habetong
Moisturizing Shampoo
Nutrition
Rich eggs contain
nutrients, moisture factor, combined with nutritional supplements,
deep moisturizing hair, promote hair on the absorption of nutrients,
to help re-hair, hair loss protein supplement!
DOUBLE PROTECTION
SUPER PLIANCY &
WIPE OFF
Usage: Wet hair, take
the appropriate product on the hair, slightly to produce a rich foam,
then wash with water, if necessary, Better results can be repeated.
Note: if it gets, flush with fresh water.
Is
anyone else really worried about that last sentence? It's as if
we're being given these really important instructions or a warning,
only the key part of the sentence is missing.
In any
case, I hope you enjoyed.
And
don't worry—I listen to public radio way more than I read shampoo.
So hopefully my English skills will still be intact upon my return.
Of course only time will tell...